Glass half full-- of bacon, that is....

There comes a time in every parent's life when they realize that their grocery buying habits will not be permanent. Oh sure, there is a natural progression in food changes as infant becomes toddler, toddler becomes school child and school child becomes the bottomless pit of the teenager, but that moves along a steady arc upwards. The referred to change deals with the abrupt drop in food required at home once a bottomless pit child leaves.

Consider this a public service announcement: Folks, be prepared to let some milk go bad.

This past weekend, our little family of now three (the fourth member is currently living two hours from home and is actively cultivating the legend that his phone only functions if cash or food are needed) made a typical Sunday breakfast and sat down to the feast. We ate like true Americans, without abandon and with no regard for the strain on our pajama pants, and for the first time in the history of the Pement family, there was bacon left at the end of the meal.

**A quick side note on bacon: Yes, bacon has become very popular these last few years. Bacon has become a meat cliche' but no one cares about whether or not it has passed its "cool" prime. Much like the music of Journey, bacon is ever present and always good.**

Leftover bacon? In this house?? This must be what Luke Skywalker felt like when confronted with the knowledge of his paternity. "That's impossible!!"

Opening the refrigerator to put the FOUR pieces of leftover bacon away, it became clear that not only were we flush with bacon, but we also had been nursing the same container of juice for days! Bags of chips were hanging around like laundry waiting to be folded- no one showing any great interest in taking care of business. A block of cheese that by this point in the week should have been reduced to something that would pass as a modest necklace pendant was still large enough to support one side of a car-jack, if circumstances required it to do so. This has been very discombobulating, to say the least.


So, to the parents out there who have yet to go through this, be prepared. Remember that old bananas make great bread, spoiled milk makes great pancakes and biscuits, and you can't tell that cheese has gotten hard and crusty at the edges if you shred it and melt it over chips. However, you should never take a chance with wine. Once it's opened, it's best to just polish it off, to be safe.